Tuesday, April 08, 2014

Egg-sausted

Guys.  The Mister gets up ridiculously early.

I'm not even saying that as an anti-morning person.  I feel pretty confident that even if you like getting up in the morning, 4AM is not what you consider to be the proper time for that.

He gets up at that time and works out, which is even more crazy to me (mad props for that kind of dedication).  And the last few days he's asked me to get up and make him breakfast while he does that working out thing.

My body resisted this fiercely.  So fiercely, in fact, that I "made breakfast" four or five times before I even got out of bed.

This Dog Shame is probably more successful
at breakfast cooking than a 4am me.
I knew I needed to get up and put an egg in a frying pan for my husband.  So that's what I did.  In my groggy half-awake haze, I went downstairs and put the entire egg in the frying pan.  I pulled hard boiled egg out of the frying pan a few minutes later and left it on the kitchen counter for him, then went back to bed.

Then I woke up a bit and realized I hadn't really done any of that.  So in my groggy half-awake haze I
  went downstairs and greased the pan with some pine-scented candle wax.  I cracked in the eggs and a few minutes later I scooped out a perfectly cooked egg and left if on the kitchen counter for him, then went back to bed.

Then I woke up a bit and realized I hadn't really done any of that.  So in a groggy half-awake haze I went downstairs and found he had already made himself eggs and left them out on the counter for himself.  Then I went back to bed.

Then I woke up a bit and realized I hadn't really done any of that.  So in a groggy half-awake haze I went downstairs and made eggs but nothing was memorable about the experience.  I left it on the kitchen counter for him, then went back to bed.

Then I woke up for ... a few hours later... and realized that if I had managed to actually get out of my head and get out of bed to make eggs for my husband's breakfast, there was a very real possibility that I either served a luke-warm raw egg in it's shell or eggs in candle wax.

Turns out I had managed to make reasonable eggs at some point.  Husband was pleased.  but now it's time for a nap.

When you have something you need to do as soon as you get out of bed, 
do you ever dream about it?  Tell me in the comments!

3 comments:

Jen Anderson said...

I've had the dream where you get up and get ready for work/school and then wake up for real and have to do it all over again.


Have you explained to your husband that if he asks you to get up and make him eggs again that he may be risking food poisoning? Or poisoning poisoning?

I mean there's love, and then there's accidentally killing someone.

For My Love Of said...

Omg. I absolutely could not do it. I can't make myself get up early to do things I actually want to do, let alone something for someone else. If all else failed and you reallydid feed him pine scented eggs, i think he might just thing you seasoned them funny. Oh well, i hope he loses that work out dedication. Or starts to fix his own breakfast!

Kp said...

he swears that I did, in fact, get up and make him eggs and that I didn't make them with candle wax. But he's also taken to making his own eggs in the morning, so we may never know for sure.